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Why the most outspoken people in the workplace are not always the most confident

Image Credits: UnsplashImage Credits: Unsplash
  • The loudest people at work may be overcompensating for insecurity, using volume to mask self-doubt or fear of being overlooked, rather than demonstrating true self-assurance.
  • Confident individuals show humility, actively listen to others, and consistently deliver results, rather than relying on attention-seeking behaviors.
  • A healthy workplace culture values diverse communication styles, promoting both quiet and outspoken voices, which helps employees feel secure and confident in their contributions.

[WORLD] In any office or work environment, it’s not uncommon to see individuals who dominate meetings, conversations, and social situations. These individuals are often seen as extroverted, assertive, and confident. However, what many don’t realize is that loudness doesn’t always correlate with true self-assurance. In fact, some of the most vocal people in the workplace may be compensating for insecurity, fear, or self-doubt.

Understanding this distinction is key for both employers and employees to create a more empathetic, effective work culture. In this article, we explore why the loudest voices at work aren’t always the most confident, and how both individuals and organizations can approach this dynamic in a healthier way.

The Difference Between Loudness and Confidence

At first glance, the loudest people at work might appear to be the most confident. They speak up during meetings, offer their opinions without hesitation, and seem to have no fear of judgment. Confidence, on the other hand, is often described as the ability to express oneself with assurance and self-reliance, regardless of how loudly one speaks.

Benjamin Laker, an expert in leadership and workplace behavior, emphasizes that confidence isn’t about volume or being the loudest voice in the room. According to Laker, “Confidence comes from within, while loudness is often a manifestation of external signals.” The loudest people at work may be projecting strength, but they may not necessarily feel it internally.

Why Loudness Doesn’t Equate to Confidence

There are several reasons why the loudest individuals at work may not always be the most confident. These include psychological factors, past experiences, and cultural pressures. Let’s take a closer look at some of the key reasons behind this phenomenon.

1. Overcompensating for Insecurity

For some people, speaking loudly or dominating conversations is a way to mask insecurities. They may not feel secure in their position or their abilities, and so they use loudness as a defense mechanism. By being the center of attention, they can temporarily divert attention away from their internal struggles or fear of inadequacy.

In fact, many people who are externally loud are actually struggling with a lack of self-worth. They may constantly seek validation or approval from others, which can result in overly assertive behavior. Rather than true confidence, their loudness is an attempt to hide or distract from their vulnerability.

2. The Fear of Being Overlooked

Another reason some people may be loud at work is due to the fear of being overlooked or dismissed. In competitive workplaces, individuals may feel the need to make their presence known by speaking loudly or frequently. By doing so, they hope to ensure they are noticed by leadership, colleagues, or clients.

This fear of invisibility can be particularly acute for people in lower positions or marginalized groups. They may feel that they need to assert themselves more aggressively to be taken seriously, even though this behavior may be driven by anxiety rather than true confidence.

3. A Misunderstanding of Leadership

In many organizations, leadership is often associated with assertiveness and extroversion. As a result, individuals may feel that being loud and vocal is synonymous with being a strong leader. However, true leadership is more about the ability to inspire, empower, and listen to others than it is about dominating a conversation.

Some individuals, particularly those who have not developed authentic leadership skills, may feel that by being loud, they are demonstrating strength and authority. However, this type of behavior can often alienate others and hinder effective collaboration. Leadership is not about being the loudest voice in the room, but rather being able to motivate others, make thoughtful decisions, and create an inclusive environment.

How to Recognize True Confidence at Work

So, how can you differentiate between someone who is truly confident and someone who is merely loud? Here are a few signs to watch out for:

1. Self-Reflection and Humility

Confident individuals tend to be more self-reflective and humble. They are comfortable with their strengths and weaknesses and are not afraid to admit when they don’t know something. They value feedback and use it as a tool for growth, rather than as a source of insecurity.

Loud individuals, on the other hand, may shy away from self-reflection because it forces them to confront their vulnerabilities. They may resist feedback or dismiss it outright, as it threatens their carefully crafted image of certainty.

2. Empathy and Active Listening

One of the key traits of confident individuals is their ability to listen and empathize with others. Rather than dominating conversations, they create space for others to share their ideas and perspectives. This demonstrates emotional intelligence and a belief in the value of others’ input.

In contrast, loud individuals may interrupt others or dismiss their contributions, as they are more focused on making their own voices heard. They may have difficulty listening to others, as it challenges their desire for control and recognition.

3. Consistent Performance

True confidence is often reflected in consistent performance, not just in occasional outbursts or displays of dominance. Confident individuals don’t feel the need to prove themselves repeatedly because they trust in their abilities and know that their results speak for themselves.

Loud individuals, however, may use noise to cover up a lack of consistent performance. They may overcompensate for their lack of results with exaggerated claims or attention-seeking behavior.

The Role of Workplace Culture

Workplace culture plays a significant role in how people express themselves and how confidence is perceived. In cultures that prioritize extroversion and assertiveness, loud individuals may be rewarded with recognition and leadership opportunities. However, this can create a toxic environment where quieter, more introspective individuals feel overlooked or undervalued.

A healthier workplace culture encourages a variety of communication styles and allows employees to express themselves in ways that feel authentic to them. This might mean encouraging quieter employees to speak up in meetings, or it might involve offering more opportunities for one-on-one communication.

Laker points out that “a culture that celebrates diversity—both in terms of background and communication style—can help create an environment where true confidence can thrive.” By valuing different types of contributions, organizations can help employees feel secure and empowered, regardless of their communication style.

Practical Strategies for Building True Confidence

If you find that you or someone you work with is struggling with loudness as a form of overcompensation, there are several strategies that can help build true confidence:

Develop Emotional Intelligence: Being able to manage emotions and empathize with others is a crucial aspect of confidence. Practice listening actively and being open to feedback, even when it’s difficult.

Practice Self-Reflection: Regular self-reflection allows you to identify areas of growth and acknowledge your strengths and weaknesses. This process fosters self-assurance that comes from within, not from external validation.

Seek Mentorship: Finding a mentor who can provide guidance and feedback is an excellent way to build authentic confidence. A mentor can help you see your strengths and areas for improvement without feeling the need to constantly assert yourself.

Focus on Results: Rather than focusing on volume or visibility, focus on producing quality work and delivering results. True confidence is reflected in your ability to perform and make meaningful contributions, not in how loudly you speak.

The loudest people at work are not always the most confident. While loudness can be a sign of assertiveness, it is often a mask for insecurity, fear, or a desire for recognition. True confidence, on the other hand, comes from within and is characterized by self-assurance, humility, emotional intelligence, and consistent performance.

By fostering a workplace culture that values diverse communication styles and encourages self-reflection and empathy, both employees and organizations can create a more inclusive, supportive environment where confidence can thrive in all its forms. As Benjamin Laker advises, “True confidence comes from being comfortable with who you are and knowing your worth, not from being the loudest voice in the room.”

By recognizing the difference between loudness and true confidence, we can all contribute to a more positive and productive workplace culture.


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