There are days when everything seems like too much. The alarm goes off, and you just lie there staring at the ceiling, fatigued. You go through the motions, but nothing feels natural. It's as if you're carrying an unseen load that no one else can see. You're not okay—you know that—but you can't see any simple way to make the world look bright and sparkly again.
In these moments, it's crucial to remember that you're not alone. Millions of people worldwide experience similar feelings of overwhelm and fatigue. The pressures of modern life, with its constant connectivity and endless to-do lists, can leave even the most resilient individuals feeling drained. Recognizing this shared human experience can be the first step towards finding comfort and initiating positive change.
It's okay not to be okay. It's not okay to stay in this place, feeling overwhelmed and disoriented. Demands appear to be coming from everywhere, yet no one direction feels warmer or fuzzier than the others. But here's the thing: you don't have to accomplish everything at once. You simply need to start. The path back to feeling normal does not have to be complicated. In reality, it can be as simple as following three steps.
Three simple steps can take you from attempting to alter everything to realizing that you can regain control, one moment at a time. You do not need to have all of the answers today. You simply need to begin.
This simple three-step method is not spectacular, but it is effective. It's about giving oneself room to breathe and the opportunity to take things one at a time. And as you progress, you'll see that you're not just getting by; you're improving. That's more than enough for now.
So, what are the three steps?
Step 1: Ground yourself in the present.
When life gets overwhelming, your mind races from one concern to the next. It's like attempting to catch your breath while running a marathon.
The first step towards feeling better again is to stop. Exactly where you are.
Close your eyes and take a deep breath. Feel your feet against the ground. Consider the texture of the ground beneath your shoes or the coldness of the floor under your bare feet. Listen to the sounds around you, whether it's the buzz of the air conditioner, distant talk, or even quiet. Breathe in through your nose, slowly filling your lungs, and then exhale, releasing the tension. Repeat this several times. This is about reconnecting with your body and the present moment.
Extend your basic senses. Name five visible objects, four tactile items, three auditory things, two olfactory things, and one gustatory item. This practice brings you back to your body and the environment around you. It allows you to concentrate on what's in front of you rather than the spiral of thoughts in your head.
This grounding technique, often referred to as the "5-4-3-2-1 method," has been widely recognized by mental health professionals as an effective tool for managing anxiety and stress. By engaging all five senses, you create a strong connection to the present moment, effectively interrupting the cycle of worry and rumination. This practice not only helps in immediate stress relief but also trains your brain to focus on the here and now, building resilience over time.
Step 2: Break down. What's overwhelming you?
When everything seems to be collapsing around you, it's easy to become lost in the chaos. Problems pile up, one on top of the other, until they feel like an insurmountable barrier.
The second stage to feeling better again is to break down what is overwhelming you into smaller, more manageable chunks... so you don't have to face the entire wall at once.
Begin by naming what is upsetting you. If at all possible, write it down. When you see your anxieties on paper, they seem less scary. They are no longer simply spinning around in your head.
Concentrate on the one thing you can handle right now. It could be something minor, such as making a long-overdue phone call or organizing a crowded place. If making a call seems too daunting, begin by just writing down the number. Then dial it. Then speak.
With each modest action, you chip away at the daunting wall... until you find it's made up of smaller bricks, which you can deal with one at a time.
Step 3: Reconnect with what gives you joy.
When you're not feeling well, joy can feel like a distant memory, something you once had but lost along the way.
The final step toward feeling well again is to reconnect with what makes you happy.
This is not about pushing oneself to be cheerful or pretending that everything is wonderful. It is about finding small moments that improve your spirits, even if only slightly.
Consider the last time you felt a spark of delight. Perhaps it was listening to your favourite song, taking a walk in the park, or spending time with a buddy. Whatever it was, try again. Begin small. Play the song, even if only for a few minutes. Step outside to feel the sun on your face or the breeze on your skin. Call or text someone who makes you happy.
These simple gestures of delight may appear insignificant when you are struggling, yet they are extremely powerful. They serve as a reminder that life is more than just the difficult moments. They create pockets of light in the dark.
It's important to note that seeking joy doesn't mean ignoring your problems or pretending they don't exist. Instead, it's about creating a balance in your emotional landscape. By actively seeking out positive experiences, you're not just distracting yourself from difficulties, but actually building emotional resilience. Research in positive psychology has shown that regularly engaging in activities that bring joy can increase overall life satisfaction and even boost your immune system, making you better equipped to handle life's challenges.
Consider coming back to being OK as a sequence of deliberate choices. Begin by creating precise, attainable goals. Instead of nebulous intentions, set concrete goals for what you want to accomplish each day. Divide these goals into actionable stages.
Give yourself a break—or two or three!—and you'll have a better chance of maintaining high productivity levels. Working constantly might cause burnout and decreased efficiency. Schedule small rests between jobs to refresh. Step away from your desk, stretch, or go for a little walk. These breaks can revitalize your mind and body, allowing you to be more productive when you return to work.
Finally, accept the power of delegating. You don't need to do everything yourself. Identify and allocate responsibilities that others can manage. This frees up your time for jobs that require your specific expertise and attention.
Remember, the journey back to feeling okay is not always linear. There may be setbacks and difficult days, but that doesn't mean you're not making progress. Each step forward, no matter how small, is a victory. Celebrate these small wins and be patient with yourself. Recovery and personal growth take time, and it's okay to move at your own pace. The most important thing is to keep moving forward, even if it's just one tiny step at a time.
It is acceptable to say that you are not okay, but the most powerful thing you can do for yourself is to take basic, tiny, and energetic steps that make it easier for you to be OK every day.
What will you do today to get yourself back on track?
